They did not come
to hear about you.

Most advisers run a first meeting as a presentation. The prospect leaves knowing about you, having come to find out whether you understand them.

What the first meeting is for

Most advisers run a first meeting as a presentation: here is our firm, our process, our philosophy, our credentials. The prospect sits through it and leaves knowing about you.

They came to find out whether you understand them. Those are different meetings and only one of them ends in a client.

The ratio

You should be talking for roughly a quarter of the time. Most advisers talk for three quarters and believe it went well, because meetings in which we talk feel good.

The test: at the end, could you write down the three things that actually worry this person, in their words? If not, you presented rather than met.

Questions that open people up

"What made you start looking?" Almost never returns. It is usually a change — a sale, a death, a retirement date, an adviser who stopped calling. That answer is the whole meeting.

"What has to be true in five years for you to feel good about this?" Moves past performance to what they actually want.

"What did your last adviser do well, and what did they miss?" Tells you exactly what to be. Listen for process complaints rather than performance ones — those are the failures that would apply to you too.

"Is there anything you are worried I am going to say?" Uncomfortable and enormously revealing. Frequently the real reason they have put this off for two years.

What to say about yourself, and when

Last, briefly, and only against what they told you. Not the firm story — the two parts of it that answer the concerns they just raised.

A prospect who was burned by an adviser who disappeared does not need your investment philosophy. They need to know how often you make contact and who answers the phone.

Be honest about fit

If they are not right for you, say so in the meeting and refer them somewhere better. It costs you a prospect who would have been a difficult client and buys you a reputation that produces several.

Advisers are frightened of this, and it is the single most persuasive thing you can do, because almost nobody else in their search will do it.

How to close

Not with a proposal. With a summary of what you heard, in their language, and one specific next step with a date.

They should leave thinking they understood me, not that was a good presentation. Only one of those gets a second meeting.